Is couch to ultramarathon even a thing… there is a long journey there that leaves a lot untold.
Buckle up, folks, because this is the story of how a flabby dad like me became an ultra runner. Yes, you read that right – me, a guy who couldn’t run a mile without wheezing like a dying walrus.
It all started with a desperate desire to get in shape. Feeling guilty about eating aIl the kids sweets and was tired of my dad bod, feeling like a sloth on a couch. So, I laced up my trainers and decided to run to the park and do a loop. I managed to make it to the corner of the road a vast distance of 150m where I needed to stop and compose myself while my lungs were desperately trying to find air.
But I was determined to get fitter. So, I started small – a few jogs around the park, nothing too crazy. And, to my surprise, I actually started to enjoy it. Maybe it was the wind on my balding skull, or the sweet smell of nature (or was it just sweat? Who knows?)
But just when I thought I was getting the hang of this running thing, I heard about ultra running – you know, races that are longer than a marathon, like running to the moon and back (okay, not really, but it feels like it).
My 1st trail race was a 14km then a 22km and progressively built up to 25km and then, the leap of faith, skipping over the marathon distance and entering a local 50km race.
At the start line I felt l like a total fish out of water. I mean, I was surrounded by these super fit, super toned athletes who looked like they could run a marathon backwards in their sleep. Meanwhile, I was huffing and puffing like the big bad wolf trying to blow down a house made of bricks.
It was tough. There were times when I thought my legs were going to fall off and my lungs were about to give up. But I kept going, fuelled by sheer stubbornness and the promise of a giant pizza at the finish line.
And to my surprise, I actually finished the darn thing. Me – the guy who once had trouble running to catch the ice cream truck – ran a freaking ultra marathon.
Since then, I’ve completed multiple ultra races, each one a new chance to prove to myself that I’m capable of more than I ever thought possible. So, if you’re feeling like a couch potato and want to give running a try, I say go for it. Just be prepared for blisters, chafing, and the occasional existential crisis. But trust me, it’s all worth it for the sweet taste of victory (and pizza).
Ultra running is like a never-ending buffet of pain and suffering, with a side of scenery.
My story is not a unique one, but actually quite stereotypical in the ultra running community, each distance leaves you wandering about the next and you learn so much about your own resilience along the way.
So, if you’re feeling like you can’t do something because you don’t look like a Greek god or goddess, just remember – if I can go from flabby father to ultra runner, so can you!
JRR Tolkien “It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.”
Start with couch to front door and enjoy the journey!
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some hot dogs to go demolish.